5 Things Emotionally Resilient People Don’t Do
Most people think about emotional resilience as a skill, something you can build and train with practice.And even though this is partly true, there’s a deeper truth about emotional resilience that most of us miss:Being more emotionally resilient is often about what you do less of, not more of.As a psychologist, I work with many people who look like though they don’t have much emotional resilience:The slightest fear or anxiety throws them into spirals of worry and panic The smallest negative comment leads to instant insecurity and self-doubt Little frustrations quickly escalate into hours or days of angry ruminationMost people don’t actually lack the capacity for emotional resilience. Instead, they’re held back from their natural emotional resilience by a collection of bad habits.If you’d like to become more emotionally resilient, learn to identify these habits in your own life and work to eliminate them. I think you’ll find that your natural emotional resilience is not far behind.After the fact, it’s not so hard to see that kicking yourself when you’re down is not an especially good way to get better — much less feel better.And yet, in the heat of the moment immediately following a mistake, so many of us instinctively go straight to intense self-criticism:
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